Growing up as the only child up until the age of 11, I really did only have myself to entertain. At times it would feel lonely but looking back, I was never truly alone. I now see and understand just how connected I was to my truth and the universe. I had a nurturing heart and a wild soul. I would spend hours upon hours outside drawing sigils in the air. Making mud-pies. Mixing fresh picked herbs into water to create perfumes – for my inner sage was joyful and she loved making magic potions and casting spells.
If I ever came across a dead animal, so be it, a toad, a rat, a bird, I would insist that we gave it a funeral. When my grandad asked me for the first time “Larisha, why do you want to do this?”, I replied “They need to have a proper farewell grandad, so they can Passover to the other side and be at peace”. Looking back now, my younger self was clearly onto something.
However, it wasn’t always unicorn’s and fairy dust, unfortunately my innocence was stolen from me as a child when I was sexually abused. For years I held my truth of what happened to me, due to fear and confusion. As a result of this, I endured a deep dark phase of depression, anxiety and self-harming, all of which I kept to myself, buried within.
Becoming a mother was what helped with triggering my awakening. My son has been the blessing that has reminded me, of just how beautiful existence can truly be and has helped restore the magic I once lost. Sadly, it took another journey of me going to hell and back to lead me on the spiritual path that I am now on.
At 28 I got raped and my whole world came crashing down. Memories of my childhood trauma also came flooding back and I was hit with a double whammy of pain and torment.
This time I decided to take-action. Speak my truth and finally start to become aware of the healing that was needed. I went to therapy and got diagnosed with complex PTSD. I opted out from taking prescribed medication and instead surrendered to the Divine. Some people may disagree with that choice, but I listened to my intuition and my intuition has grown stronger. I was on a mission to not allow my traumas to define me and started to take control of my life.
In 2019, I became a reiki practitioner and since then I have started to listen to this calling towards shamanism. I am excited to say, I will be embarking on a shamanic course later this year. This calling feels as If I will be going back to my roots, back to another time – discovering yet another aspect of myself.
By embracing shadow work, decoding dreams and being involved in moon rituals, it has helped me to reconnect with different aspects of myself, including my inner child. It is through my pain, continuous healing and experiencing a dark night of the soul, that has helped me to get back onto the right path, the path of a healer.
Energy healing. Mystical and metaphysical knowledge. Tea. Astrology. Spirit animals. Crystals.